Body calming meditation, before breath meditation

I admit, I've not been very consistent recently due to frequent travel, changing time zones, and other work-imposed changes. While I tried to meditate as and when I could, the degree of focus isn't the same as I'm mentally and physically so bloody tired... More than once, I closed my eyes en-route to a meeting, only to wake up with my head slouched on my chest and drool on my belly.

This afternoon, though, I was able to meditate for about 45 minutes, with ever increasing mindfulness, without any will or mental "force" required to focus. Instead, the focus happened quite naturally.

How did that happen?  Rather than directly focusing on the breath and forcing the mind to zoom in on a subtle object, I started with body calming meditation, before proceeding to breath meditation. This has a few advantages:
a. You allow your mind to go naturally from the large & course sensations (e.g. body aches) to the refined & subtle (e.g. sensation of the breath).
b. You are constantly in the present moment, which helps remove the larger impediments to mindfulness (e.g. thinking about past and future).
c. There is no force required, as you don't have to force your mind to focus.

The keys here are to ensure that you are comfortable, and to be kindful: kind and mindful. It's ok if your mind drifts and starts thinking about something else; just remind (and not beat) yourself, and go back to your meditation object. The best part about starting with body calming meditation is: if you are constantly distracted at the breath meditation stage, you can always go back to focusing on your body.

Meditation instructions

1. Ensure that you are physically comfortable. It took me a few minutes of adjusting the meditation cushion (I meditate on a buckwheat shell pillow, as I've a big ass that gets numb on the round zazen cushions). I also used a comfortable eye-cover, to prevent getting distracted by light. 
2. After settling down, focus first on your toes, shins, and came to be aware of the sensations there. If there was any tension, I mentally asked "What do you, body part, really want?" then I let it go. If needed, I mindfully shifted my body part to be comfortable. There was a point when a certain body part was actually painful: I focused on it, and was just kind to it mentally saying "may you, body part, be well and happy". It helps to feel towards it as you would towards a pet or something loveable. 
3. From the lower parts of the body, gradually and systematically move upwards, ending with the top of your head. For each body part, it was a case of letting the part be, being kindful, paying attention to it and being in the present moment, and letting it be comfortable.
4. The order of the body calmness "sweep" can also be altered: no hard and fast rules here. 
5. [A note about distractions: they happen. While I was mostly in the present moment, there were times when my mind lapsed into the past and future, and I had random thoughts (including about my career). The important thing isn't to bring your mind back or to scold yourself, but just note that you aren't focusing on what you're supposed to, and to remind yourself on the original focus object.]  
6. At the end of this "body sweep", when your mind is alert, peaceful and also quite in the present moment and when your body feels quite peaceful and calm, the only moving thing should be your breathing. Quite naturally, let your mind focus on the breath. It also helps to instruct your mind three times "Focus on the the beginning and end of the breath" and let it be. (This is called "setting up the gatekeeper", and is basically auto-suggestion.) 
7. After some time, with each in-breath, you can mentally note "peace", and exhale (mentally noting) "let go". It has a certain hypnotic effect, as with each breath, you're basically instructing your mind to keep letting go.
8. Eventually, you can focus on the entire breath, from inhalation to exhalation to the pause between breaths. The breath should get smoother and smoother.
9. To end the breathing meditation, mentally ask yourself if you enjoyed the experience, and what was the positive part of the experience? Then intentionally note at least three inhalation-exhalations (without force or intention) before opening your eyes. 

When I ended the meditation, it was very pleasant and calm, and my mind was alert and in the present moment. It wasn't quite at the "beautiful breath" stage that Ajahn Brahm speaks of, but it was perhaps at the brink of it. No nimittas or bright lights too. 

It's important not to force yourself or try too hard, but to just let things be and to be kind. If you are too tired, then go sleep for a bit before sitting again. Be kind with yourself. :)

Have a good Sunday and week ahead. 

Restarting this blog: Changes since 2010

It's been quite sometime since I last updated this blog. Since then, a couple of things have happened.

I intend to rejig and post regularly on this blog again. The intent is to share on my personal path and journey of the Dhamma, and to share some approaches & solutions to some meditation problems. I hope this could turn out to be useful to some readers out there, whoever that is.

But what were the couple of things that happened....?

In 2010, I went for my first meditation retreat with Ajahn Brahmavamso, organised by the Singapore Buddhist Fellowship, and meant for working executives. This retreat changed my life in a few important ways:

a.  I gave up drinking alcohol, and have been keeping the Five Precepts (including not killing mosquitoes) since. (As a consequence, I've not been that close to some friends whom I knew from my wine-drinking days. I guess people grow apart with different interests.)

The story behind the decision: just before we reached the retreat venue, I had this sudden craving for a Chang beer. However, I was bound by the retreat rules not to drink any alcohol at all until after the retreat.

After the retreat, I found that I had completely given up all desire for alcohol. I reflected on it, and decided that while I do like the flavours of certain types of beverages (e.g. Riesling wine), the main reason I drank was conditioning. Also, I like it when people loosen up with alcohol: usually I don't need any alcohol to loosen up, though.

There was also the fact that alcohol consumption dulls the mind. From the retreat, I felt it was much, much, much more fun to meditate than to imbibe.

Some of my colleagues started joking that I had become a monk after the retreat. They weren't aware that I very seriously considered that possibility.

b. I started meditating much more regularly. This was the first retreat which really "hooked" me on meditation. In the middle of the retreat, Ajahn mentioned that the experience of samadhi causes the mind to "leap towards meditation", which was exactly what happened. (One morning, I was so enthused that I went to the meditation hall at 4am, only to find that the a/c wasn't turned on at all.)

Nowadays, I meditate whenever I am travelling in the car (I have a driver, since I'm based in India), and try to meditate for at least 20 mins everyday. On Sundays, I try to keep it free and to meditate & nap as much as I can.

c. The way I (try to) meditate now is quite different, too. Ajahn Brahm's method is VERY different from the other meditation teachers I've encountered. He likes to say that there are two types of meditation: 2nd Noble Truth meditation (craving creates suffering) and 3rd Noble Truth meditation (cessation of that craving). He also likes to say that wisdom-power is more effective than will-power. And to focus on applying kindfulness (mindfulness with kindness).

The 2010 retreat really opened my eyes to the power of mindfulness and letting go.

d. After this retreat, I consider my Dhamma teachers to be the Buddha and Ajahn Brahm, and was fortunate enough to subsequently introduce Ajahn (who is still alive) to my parents and wife (then my girlfriend).

This has had a very beneficial effect on my personal relationships: my parents relationship has arguably become much better, and my relationship with my wife has also really been reinforced by the Dhamma (especially after our latest 2014 retreat).

That said, I do sometimes have to be careful not to hard-sell Ajahn Brahm too often, which my wife repeatedly reminds me.

e. On Ajahn Brahm's advice (during the return flight, when we ended up sharing the same flight and were on the same row), I started reading the suttas directly, especially the Majjhima Nikaya (Middle Length Discourses) translated by Bhikkhu Bodhi.

I also started to download Ajahn Brahm's podcasts, including his sutta talks. His talks are quite enlightening: his mastery of Pali is very thorough, as he was one of the first Westerner monks to translate the Vinaya (Monastic discipline) from the original Pali into English. As such, his grasp of Pali is somewhat street-savvy & pragmatic, and not overly academic. For example, the Eighth factor of the Eightfold Path (samma samadhi) is often mistranslated as right concentration: Ajahn points out that it's more helpful to translate it as right stillness, especially since samatha (calming, tranquility) is etymologically linked to samadhi.

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I still strongly respect my first meditation teacher, Richard (Vajiro). I will always be grateful and appreciative to him for having introduced me to the Dhamma, and to basic meditation. For those who are interested, he still runs his Basic Buddhism Course (the other BBC).